Saturday, June 11, 2011
So I am currently off in the deep wilderness of some state camping park. Lucky for me however my brother has a cell phone that doubles as a WiFi hotspot, so I am not left with out my precious internet. Now don't take me for one one who does not enjoy the outdoors and can't live without internet, but it is just more fun then watching my brothers, and their friends get wasted while one bitch continues to give me ungodly amounts of shit asking who brought me, and how I am worthless, and then asks me to do her favors. Stupid worthless sloshed whore oh how I hope you drown in a pool of your precious liquor, and your inevitable vomit. We will call this women (and I use that term loosely) Brittney for that is her name, and I couldn't care less if she found this. Then there is David; the wanna be gangster shit head. He is the definition of an alcoholic. He refuses to admit, but I could care less. Sometimes I hope he goes driving, and crashes ending his worthless life. These too of course are the perfect couple, and want to fuck each others brains out, but they treat it as if they are still in elementary school as if it is wrong to like someone, but if they wear to have an offspring I would have to stick a stake though it's black heart so I say it is for the best. The others are okay my brothers are great and my sister in law is very nice. There are two other campers, T and A both are nice, and seem to not mind me so much. So I am here, sober as monk while everyone around me is drunk as all hell. So I decided to tell the story of my legal problems (as asked by Garret) mentioned in my last post. So lets began at the beginning, last year in December'; not sure on the exact date. My friend J and I picked up a few grams of some of the dankest pot we had seen in awhile. We wear set to go too his house once his parents left for the night to go too a basketball game. We decided to light up and cruise around, which is not far from what we do normally. We plan too do this until his parents leave. Fast forward a few hours, and a few smoke sessions we are thoroughly baked, and ready to head to his house too check if they are gone. Now it is around nine or ten at this point. we are in his neighborhood, and down the street near his house I could have sworn I saw a cops lights for a split second. I ask my friend, and he assures me there is no cop. So I continue to drive that way. Next I know I am at 4-way intersection a block away from his house with a car on the other side that I can't make out what it is. As I pass it I see the words "State Cop" on the side of the car. My heart sinks to my colon, and then finds it way out of my body into the smoke filled car as I shit myself in fear. I turn to my friend and tell him I just saw a cop which with him being stoned terrifies him as well. Then we think we see the cop turn, and our hopes rise a little, only to be shot down by the almighty God's lustful cum load as suddenly my car is lit up with flashing red, and blue lights. I pull off to the side and park. Now before I go any further I would like to add a little background to this story. I am a hell of a driver when stoned, which I know "lol but your stoned heyuck derp derp how would you know." I have driven people who wear completely sober around, and they kept asking me if I was really high, or just fucking around all the while I thought I was in a space ship. So back to the story. We rejoin our hero as he is freaking out trying to figure out what he did when suddenly there is a tap at the window. There stood a state trooper, and as I roll down my window a cloud of evidence billows out of my car as if its trying to fuck with me, and get me arrested. So I smile at cop, but not an "I got this" smile but more an "oh please don't notice my eyes" smile. He asks for the usual license and registration. Now this is the first time I have ever been involved with the law in my entire life other then when my brothers dealt with them. So this mixed with the fact that I am as high as I have ever been I have no idea what he means by registration, so my stupid ass hands him my fucking license plate sticker. Then I find it for real and give him that. So he runs me though all of the tests, which is a blur so I can't really get into detail on it, but next I know I am at the hospital getting blood drawn for a drug test. Now mind you I hate needles. None the less go over without a hitch, and then I taken over too the county jail. Where I sit for god know how long. I have to call my mother too pick me up, which is the worst call of my life. Fast forward three months, and I am in court and found guilty for driving while visibly impaired, and possession. Then later I am sentenced too six months probation, three months restricted license,two thousand dollars in court fees, and I have to attend two NA meetings a week. Now with my probation I have a random drug test once a month. Which leads too the legal problem that happened last week. I get a call saying I tested positive for something, but of course they can't tell me what over the phone. Now I had not been doing any pot since the ordeal, but I had been trying DMT which I thought had no drug test for it yet. So I began to freak out, I call my mother, and tell her about all this. She has me go up there too find out what it is. I come to find out I tested positive for my Adderall. So I kinda fucked myself over there XD. I have since sworn off anything tell my time is over, for it is just not worth the risk. So there is my story I did not proof read it because I am tired and just want to post it.